no more boy
Well that's torn it. Have really done it now. Dumped the boy :-(
He just sat there and took it. I told him I wanted to be a proper couple who talked about an "us" and not 2 "I'"s and he never said anything. Never said my interpretations of his intentions were wrong or that actually he did love me. nothing.
Now here I am off to California tomorrow and can't stop bawling my eyes out. Not Good. Client will not appreciate a sobbing wreck training them all week. Must get it together and stop having stupid female thoughts like: am I un-lovable? will I ever be able to find someone who can stand to be with me long enough to be a proper couple? how will I cope without him?
hate feeling like this and know it will take a bloody long time to start feeling better. bloody hindsight...
Houston, Phoenix, Caifornia, London, New York
ahhh yes - sounds great, doesn't it? During a 6 week period I will have been in 5 different time zones and 2 different countries. Ah the glamour, the food, the importance of my position...
(all a complete load of twaddle of course - the glamour consists of red-eye flights and thrombosis-threat, the food is airline cardboard pizza and the importance is about as much as your average lackey gets!...)
can't even say it enhances my outlook on the world (one office interior is pretty much like the next...)
oh well....onto the next time zone I guess!
Gutted
Am gutted - after weeks of getting excited about what costume to wear for Halloween (gay friends mean costumes are interesting - cowgirls, French maids and tuxedos are the most recent suggestions), work has decided rather than hang out and enjoy the frivolity of this fun holiday, I have to be on the other side on the country in California :-( am gutted - I love an excuse for a party and not sure me turning up to our clients in a French maid's outfit would go down well!!
